Ladies: You Woke Up with a D*ck



Something happened while you were asleep!!

A transformation.

You woke up in the middle of the night oblivious of what had happened while you were sleep. You strode sleepy eyed to the bathroom to pee. As a lady, you sat on the toilet seat and when you were done, you fetched tissue paper to clean up and felt something big in-between your legs.

What’s this in between my legs.

You held it in your hands like it was a piece of cloth from your nighties only to hold a dick.


You screamed.

You rushed out of the bathroom to the mirror and yes you have a dick.

Where did your pussy go?

Apparently this was a solar eclipse type of phenomenon that happens once in 100 years in your family where the eldest daughter gets a dick for 24 hours. Your mum told you about it but you taught it was folklore.

“This shit is real”, you screamed.

You grabbed your phone and called mummy.

“Mummy I have a dick”, you screamed as mummy said Hello.

“Shit”, mummy replied.

“Be calm. It’s just for 24 hours”, mum tried to reassure you.

You dropped the call but couldn’t sleep.

It’s 5 am but how can you sleep when you are staring at something usual in-between your legs.

It’s 7 am and you are wondering what to do with your new dick for 24 hours.

You proceed to the bathroom to shower and everything is going as usual but then unconsciously you squat to wash your coochie properly only to discover you no longer have a vagina but a penis.

You stand up.

“How do I wash this shit?”, you said.

You grabbed it in your hands, scrubbed with your soap and sponge but then you mistakenly hit your balls and it hurt.

“Damn. No wonder guys don’t like being hit in the balls”. That shit hurt” you said while spreading some soap on your dick trying to keep it clean.

You are done but it’s time to get dressed.

You try your g-strings but your dick falls off.


You try normal panties but they are too tight and uncomfortable.

You need something right enough to keep them in check but loose enough to let them breathe so you just grab a pair of shorts and wear them.

“This feels better” you said while grabbing your crotch.

You grab a pair of jeans and wear them oblivious of your new dick and the zipper gets stuck on your dick and you scream in pain.

Shit!! You screamed.

You slowly remove the zipper, careful not to cause anymore pain.

“Phewwwwww. That was close”

“Do I make up?”, You asked yourself while looking at the mirror.

“I have a dick. I don’t have to make up”.

You get dressed and proceed to leave the house but then you remember there is a Covid-19 lockdown and you should be home.


Your new dick has got you all excited that you forgot we are experiencing a pandemic.

“So how do I show off my new dick?” You asked yourself gloomy faced.

Then you felt unease like you wanted to pee.

You went to the toilet and remembered you had a goddamn dick.

Fuck it. I’m going to pee outside.

You left the house and just opposite your flat is a well cut grass and flowers.

You look around and with no one in sight, you zip down careful enough not to get it stuck again.

You grab your dick like a water hose and spray your pee all over the flowers.

“Damn this feels good”, you said to yourself smiling.

Then you remember seeing guys shake it after they pee.

You shake it and all the pee falls off.

You head back in while holding your crotch and greeting your neighbors with the swag of someone who just won a lottery.

You take off you clothes and just swing you dick around the house singing to some crazy ass music playlist on your phone.

You grab your camera and take pictures of your dick for future references. So many photos. Fun photos. Artistic photos. Moody photos. Black and white, full color, you name it.

You take photos of your new dick in a range of fancy hats, for a variety of festive occasions. The whole idea is to build up the most impressive portfolio you could possibly produce in 24 hours.

“Then whenever I got an unsolicited dick pic in the future, I’d just send a better one back in response.” you thought to yourself.

It’s almost 1 in the afternoon and your 24 hours with your dick was winding down.

You google some porn videos and watch a couple then you get hard. You used to get wet but not anymore. You have a boner. Damn!!!

It was then you realized your dick was huge. Just the type you liked when you had a pussy.

You tried sucking it but you can’t because it’s your dick.


“I will love to fuck with this dick. I want to know what it feels like to penetrate someone’s body and release my seed into them… So hot! Maybe have sex with a lady and later a dude. Just to feel what it’s really like to be at both ends of it.” you said out loud.

It’s lockdown so your wishes weren’t going to be answered.

It’s 11:25 at night and while you got tired of experimenting with your new dick, you fell asleep while watching Money Heist on Netflix.

You woke up sleepy eyed to go pee and sat on the toilet seat as you have done for the past 24 years of your life. You grabbed tissue again and cleaned up after yourself.

You proceeded to your bed and then you realized.

Shit. I don’t have a dick anymore.

You ran to the mirror and starred at your coochie as if admiring a long lost puppy.

You were happy to have your coochie back but missed your dick.

You ran to the camera to take a look at the dick pictures you took and baaaam.

No pictures.

It was just a dream.

You smiled and fell on your bed back to sleep.


Read also: Ladies, What Would You Do If You Had A Penis For A Day? (37 Women Take A Stab At The Answer) by Lorenzo Jensen III for Thought Catalog.
Click HERE to read

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