I have always loved Tyler Perry’s movies since the days of Madea’s Family Reunion. I always saw Tyler Perry as a funny character who used humor and Christian values in passing across his message. His latest effort titled Temptation: Confessions of a Marriage Counselor was void of the usual humor most of his movies possessed nevertheless it was the most captivating movie I watched all through 2013. I picked up a few life lessons from the movie I want to share with you guys. If you are yet to see the movie please follow the links at the end of this write-up, watch the movie and come back and continue this piece because you might not fully understand the story line but if you have seen the movie, lets proceed.
1. In the beginning of the movie, when counselor Judith was narrating the story, you could see that she and Brice seemingly met each other in the church so God was the origin of their friendship as children, fast-forward to their marriage, God was totally removed from the equation, they no longer went to church and considered Sunday as a stress relieving day after all the rigors of work during the week. Ecclesiastes 4:12 says “…a three fold cord is not easily broken”, as soon as God is not in the equation of relationship and marriage, devil will have easy access to the the couple involved. Marriage is like a triangle, the top vertex (edge) is God, the lower edges are man and woman, for as soon as the top edge is gone, then the triangle cannot stand.
2. Judith made a statement during the opening scenes of the movie when she said that she and Brice didn’t have much but they had each other. In relationships and marriage, no matter how dire the situation is, no matter how broke a couple might be, as long as they are together lovingly, there is nothing they cannot overcome.
3. Their life goals differed, whereas Brice’s life long dream was to work in a small pharmacy that maybe he could own one day, Judith’s dream was to become a marriage counselor. Brice wanted to leave a modest “humble” life while Judith wanted to achieve great things with her career. Brice and Harley’s opinions of her career path also differed, when Judith told Brice that she wanted to start up her counselling firm, Brice gave her reasons why not to start now telling her she had to wait for 10 to 15 years but when she told Harley, he reminded her of what she had that could make the venture successful and told her to set up a business plan and start immediately. Stop looking at a glass of water half empty, look at it half full. Support your partner’s dreams and aspirations because nothing big ever started big. As the old adage goes, you don’t climb a tree from the top, you start from the bottom.
4. When they went out for dinner and some thugs called Judith a fine ass b*tch and Brice didn’t respond she felt vulnerable and unprotected. As a guy, as long as your girlfriend/wife doesn’t feel secure around you then there is a problem.
5. Judith kept late hours with Harley discussing her private life even her sex life which was very unprofessional of her. As a married woman, keeping late night hours with a colleague or business associate someone you know is making advances to you is very wrong no matter how strong you think you are, temptations are bound to arise. The best way to resist temptation is to flee from it (1 Corin 6:18, 1 Corin 10:14, 1 Tim 6:11 and 2 Tim 2:22).
6. Women this is a warning to you. The ring on your finger means nothing to a man who wants to sleep with you. I remember a conversation Judith and Harley had in the movie when Harley made sexual advances to Judith and she reminded him that she had a husband and Harley replied “yeah I know but do you want me?”. I didn’t put one single blame on Harley because he liked a married woman, she received his advances with pleasure (green light as we call it over here). What you don’t like, you don’t watch, a man is making advances to you, let your NO be an emphatic NO, don’t plant ideas in his head.
7. In Judith’s own words “I feel so dead with you Brice, I wanna feel alive, I want to feel wanted, you took me for granted”. Brice actually took his wife for granted, this is what most men do, the same loving guy that did all those romantic things to get her stops doing all those things he did to get her as soon as he has her. He stopped challenging her mentally, he didn’t bring out the best in her, he stopped noticing her, he even forgot her birthday (2 years in a row). Nothing makes a relationship stale than when a couple stop challenging each other and end up taking each other for granted.
This movie is so full of moral lessons for both the single and married. Very powerful movie, if you haven’t watched the movie yet please endervour to do so but if you have watched the movie please watch it again and understand that marriage is not a business deal that if its not going well you quit. You are in it through the good times and not so good times. God bless us all
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