For Ladies Only: All Men Are Players


All men are born players and yes I mean football players but it all depends on the position which they play. (By the way, the guys above are Italian footballers, so ladies please take it easy with the picture
A guy’s dating life is like football and for those that don’t understand the game football here is a brief explanation.
Football is a game developed in 1863 in London,England. It is primarily played by 22 players (11 on each side) chasing around a ball with a mission to score at the opponents goal.
Football players are simply grouped into 4 groups: Goalkeepers, Defenders, Mid-fielders and Centre Forward (Strikers) and their responsibilities on the field of play vary.

team positions
For the purpose of this piece, we will make certain assumptions:
1. A girl is the goal post.
2. Every man is a type of player on the field.
3. Scoring at the opponent’s net means cheating.

Now let’s explore the kind of player guys are:
1. Goalkeeper: In football, a goalkeeper stays in front of the goalpost at all times to keep the ball from entering the post. In relationships, goalkeepers are the type of guys that love and are very protective over their spouse. They are the most faithful kind of guys to date/marry and would never cheat on their woman under any circumstance. The only downside is that they are too jealous and don’t usually support their girl’s dreams and aspirations and would prefer their wife as a housewife not a career woman where they can have their eyes on them at all times.


2. Defenders: In football, defenders can be subdivided into fullbacks and centre backs. The centre back is a player that defends the goal post to aid the goalkeeper but they go forward to try and score goals for the team on rare occasions.  In relationships, centre backs are like goalkeepers, they love, protect and cherish their girlfriends but the difference is that they are more supportive of their girlfriend’s dreams and aspirations than the goalkeeper kind of guy.
The only catch is they are more likely to cheat on their woman than the goalkeeper kind of guy. They never seek to cheat but if opportunity presents itself, the temptation might be too good to resist. On the other hand, fullbacks are also termed defenders but they go forward more often than centre backs to help the team score goals.
In relationships, fullbacks have the same characteristics as the centre backs but the only difference is they cheat more often than the fullback often with so called “understandable reasons” like she is far from him or she is a virgin.


3. Mid-fielders: In football, there are 3 types of mid-fielders; side (wingers), offensive and defensive mid-fielders.
The wingers are the type of footballers that thrive going forward to assist the striker score goals and score themselves if the opportunity presents itself.
In relationships, these kind of guys are flirts, they have a loving girlfriend/wife but most times flirt with other girls mostly for the thrill of it. The defensive midfielder in football supports the defenders more than attack. In relationships, these kind of guys love, care and support their girlfriend/wife like the defender but sometimes they get carried away into having an affair. The last type of mid-fielders are the offensive mid-fielders, they support the striker more times than any other player on the pitch. They are in relationships but don’t have a sentimental attachment to their woman, they don’t love deeply and date most times for the fun of it.


4. Strikers: In football, the striker’s job is simple: SCORE GOALS.
In relationships, the striker is simply the player. They don’t have a girlfriend but would strike down any girl on sight. Mark my words, a striker never gets married, according to them they are always “not ready” but when he decides to settle down he changes from being a striker to another position on the pitch.

Arsenal's Henry holds aloft the Golden Boot trophy at HighburyYou are dating a player, it is now your responsibility to find out what type of player he is.


4 Comments Add yours

  1. mz Chinyere says:

    Waoooow••••1derful my Luvly Son••••My ex is a Goalkeeper raised 2 power 2!! Lol• And left him 4 a Defender/centre back kinda Guy•••hmmmmm

    1. lol…mummy of the year…this one ur moving up the pitch, hope u wouldn’t leave this ur centre back boyfriend for an attacking mid-fielder ooo

  2. Oluoma says:

    My cousin of life. I Love the analysis with a football pitch. Keep it up!

    1. Awwww…thank sis. God bless

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